Category Archives: Sex

Not All Women Are Like That

I know that I have challenged you men to tell me that I was wrong about it all, to tell me that I speak untruths about the reality of life and the world around me, yet not a one of you have done so. Yet instead you call me one-in-a-million, a rare gem and flower in a world of evil, greed and superficiality. I’d like to think that it were true, as all humans would, that I was truly something special and different, yet I can nonetheless guarantee that I might well be able to assemble a battalion of women who think as I do; who feel as I do; who believe and love as I do.

What many do not realize is that even in a court of law, an expert witness upon the stand- even where generally accepted as reliable forensic evidence is concerned, is only stating an opinion. It is then up to the trier of fact alone to take in the totality of the circumstances to draw a rational conclusion as to whether or not said testimony and evidence presented is reliable, accurate, factual, relevant or likely to accurately shed light upon the truth of the matter asserted.

Take your cult leader who says to the world that All Women Are Like That and put him upon the stand to testify. Is he rational? Is he competent? Does he bring his own biases and prejudices to the witness stand? Does he have a personal interest in the outcome of this search for the truth? Does he have motive and reason to falsify his testimony? Would a rational and competent judge impeach him from the stand and instruct the jury to disregard his testimony as being overtly biased and likely false? Does he have a reputation and history for speaking untruths?

Though the universe is yet bound by the laws of physics and mathematics- laws which are universal truths and which none can escape- scientific theories are just that- theories. They are tried and tested and retried and retested in succession- year after year- by human beings wishing to shape the world to their own beliefs and perceptions and further understand and explore the mysteries of the world around them. This is done for a multitude of reasons, such as perhaps mere curiosity all the way up to the bettering of life for all of humanity. The trier of fact- that trier of fact being you, that trier of fact being me– must look carefully at the research, the methods, the individuals in question and the chain of custody for which the research or evidence has gone through in order to arrive at a conclusion whether or not the research and the individual(s) testifying to it can or cannot be trusted- whether or not it is likely to be truthful.

For many men, all women really are like what the manosphere claims them to be. This would likely be so because in their world all women really are like that, because like attracts like and these are the only women that they go around chasing, thus confirming- at least in their minds- their own biases. They don’t know any other kind of woman exists, because they’ve never met one, because they form their opinions based upon their own biases and then apply those biases to the world around them. They chase a certain type of woman and then legitimately believe that nothing else exists.

But a woman is more than capable of loving deeply and truly. Yes, I love ****- but only because I love the man that it is attached to. So wondrous, so beautiful, I think during the act that he’s so good, he feels so good; could anything feel better? My mind is filled with the thoughts of him being inside of me, of him taking all of me in the most beautiful and wondrous way that I am made as a woman. Promiscuity is damaging- the very thought of it- because of the wondrous way in which I am made. Valuable and precious it is, which is why the taking of it via force, lack of consent, or by some other form of deceptive means is psychologically devastating to the point that some women can never heal from such abuses.

I don’t think of partying, bar-hopping, of being used or abused or living a life “wild and free.” A cold beer or wine holds no appeal unless I have him by my side to love and hold me. I’m attracted to his strength, his dominance, the feel and weight of his body, the solidness of it and the way I feel so full inside of me- full because he’s inside of me, knowing he’ll never leave me, that every inch of me is beautiful, loved and cherished. It’s better if he errs on the side of seriousness than foolishness, hardness rather than softness, for I am not happy if I feel as though I cannot hold him tight and depend upon him.

But sex is more, it is about that emotional connection, about that closeness to him that cannot be replaced by any other relationship, whether in the form of friendships, relatives or acquaintances. If he’s inside of me, then all thoughts disappear to be replaced by him and only him. He is my protection, my provision, there is an economic basis, need and responsibility, but I can go back to many years ago and produce documentary evidence showing my love for him and my written and verbal testimony to that love.

It is that love, for without it life is bleak and holds no appeal. It is that need not to be alone and to be complete inside. It is that love for which even the most damaged modern woman or man still longs for on the inside. It is that love that only grows stronger through the hard times, the fights, the everything, because he knows me inside and out, as I know him. It’s the kind of love that endures over decades because none other could ever love or know me that way. Don’t discount me as a bitch when I speak of responsibilities, for humans create these responsibilities out of love and a need for one another. If I tell him that he is my one and only one, that my love is true, it is because I am his, as he in return is mine. It is the same beauty of humanity that has endured and remained unchanged throughout all of time. Not all women are as you perceive them to be, if only you were looking in the right places with the right intentions, you’d see that a woman’s heart could be pure and true as the finest of all treasures.

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Listen to Me/Victimology Part II

I’ve been a bit ill as of late and have honestly been quite apathetic in regards to my writings and other activities I normally take delight in doing. But anyone who knows me knows I’m not the type to just sit around feeling sorry for myself. The worse I feel, the more inclined I am to get up and move around more and get even more work done. Today I continued on with more deep cleaning that I have been doing for quite a while now. When I was done I had the house deep cleaned to perfection, with windows/windowsills, floors, refrigerator, bathrooms, and living room sparkling to perfection. Afterwards, I changed and cleaned up and lit a scented candle and opened up the main window in the living room, letting the fresh sunlight pour into the house. I then sat there and looked out the window, and looked around at the home that I’ve made and kept up.

It was then that I knew in my heart, that if the only thing I ever accomplished in life was this- the making of a home and family and finding stable love- that I had done well. Despite all, I had this peace in my heart when I took in the stillness and beauty of my own home, a home and stable life created when I was so young. Inside of me, as it always does, I then started having the stirrings in my heart to write again. I wanted to say what I have just said here, that I may not have some fancy Master’s Degree, I may not have some glamorous job or paid employment of any kind. I don’t bring home a paycheck, but I know I’ve done more good in this simple stable life I’ve created in a patriarchal marriage than what I could have ever probably done as a modern woman with career and independence in an “equal” relationship.

This point was drove home to me whenever my husband came home late this evening and I was encouraged all the more that I had something in my heart to write about. I never cared what he was out doing, because I knew he was committed to me, but I was kind of curious. The reason he was late was unexpected: Fox News had asked him for a brief interview for his “opinion” on some local going-ons (he turned them down, btw). Nothing too exciting, just the usual stuff- unwed motherhood, perpetual adolescence, illicit drugs and infant neglect. This is such a common problem in society that it’s not even shocking. In fact, it’s become the norm.

Going into the Victim and Women’s Rights Movement, it’s easy to see the bureaucracies that have been set up all around the country: child support, rape crisis, domestic violence crisis, counseling centers, etc… These are all attempts to overthrow the patriarchy and outlaw the policing, regulating, stigmatizing, and legislating of women’s sexuality.

But society has traditionally regulated women’s sexuality and imposed various forms of male guardianship on women- and there’s a reason for this. Just like the latest fad diet cannot replace the age-old tried-and-true reality of the laws of thermodynamics, neither can victim and feminist legislation replace the tried and true model of patriarchy. I am unaware, even dating back to ancient Mesopotamia, of any society leaving an actual written history or legacy or achieving of any scientific and social advancements that did not have political and family structures that were patriarchal (it’s worth noting that women still had great status though even in these ancient societies, btw and could still own property and engage in business if they so desired).

If you are a young girl in her teenage years or woman in her early 20s then you need to listen to this. (I signal out this age group because these are the formative years, and also the age group Pick-Up-Artists target due to these young women’s lack of life experience and knowledge of men). I know what our laws state. I know what these organizations do and I know that this is not the kind of life that you want to go down.

Let’s say you are a 16-year-old girl. Do you ever feel the stirrings inside of you to be with a young and handsome man and have babies? Do you dream of love and romance? Even when society tells you college and career first? I know I did- and that’s OK. It’s perfectly normal. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you feel this instinct then don’t deny it. That’s how you’re made and it’s a beautiful thing- but it must be done the right way.

You can close the doors, and, without shame whenever you’re all alone, truly marvel in the preciousness that is your body; the preciousness in the way you are made as a female. It’s very distinct from the way a male is made. It’s OK to be made weaker. It’s OK to be more vulnerable and emotional. It’s OK to sometimes have fear or a sense of wonderment at the uniquely female aspects of life (menstruation, pregnancy, childbirth, etc…) And trust me when I say this, men do like it. Men aren’t looking down at you for these distinctly female things (most marvel over it, actually). Men still obsess over women, women’s sexuality, the female form, femininity. If they could truly “go their own way” they wouldn’t be devoting hours upon hours to talking about and obsessing about women non-stop. And also trust that men aren’t going to judge you or think you’re honestly worth less because you’re weaker or have less career achievements. Guys like your femininity. Strong men love it and they also love that you love it. Love the things that define you as distinctly different from a man.

But know that, no matter what society tells you or what promises are made to you, only share your body with your husband. And I think it’s good to devote time to looking for a husband first. Despite the modern world, you can find a good husband if you want one. And there’s something precious too about marrying a man from your youth, perhaps your “high-school sweetheart” or a guy your age you grew up with or hung around from your area. Marriage at a very young age, even in your late teenage years, will protect you and guard your sexuality throughout these formative years and as you age more into maturity, you will have preserved your femininity and can look in delight with peace at the years gone by. A lot of the old pressures for women to marry young was more than likely to protect them and guard their sexuality in all likelihood.

And trust me, it will be good. Better than what you could ever imagine. And if you doubt what I’m saying, then look into the laws the women’s movement changed. Look into what these organizations and advocacy groups are really all about. Take a critical look at the world around you and then ask yourself if that’s something you want to get caught up in, if that’s the life you want to live. The first and foremost thing for a young woman is to not share her body with any man other than her husband and, second, not to have illegitimate children. There can be no exceptions to this.

This is the reality, that a woman would be better off having her sexuality policed. I don’t know one unwed mother that doesn’t regret putting the father’s name on the birth certificate and pursuing child-support. I don’t know one young woman who’s been caught up in such drama regarding promiscuity and illegitimate children that probably doesn’t wish, deep down inside, that a male relative would have just slapped her across the face rather than having been caught up in the system or have a slew of sexual encounters with men who wanted nothing more than sex with her. And that’s what it is, advocacy for victims and abused women and unwed mothers belongs somewhere else other than the government agencies. You’re just a case number to them, nothing more. Trust me when I say that these organizations will re-victimize the already victimized and nothing more.

What should an unwed mother do? Find a husband. It should also be enforced upon husbands the responsibility to financially support their wives. Make no mistake- the financial support of wives is of paramount importance and has long been the defining point of patriarchy and there is a valid reason for why female financial dependence upon husbands or male relatives is so important.

Nature has placed infant children by default within the care of their mothers, but nature has made men physically and socially superior to women. If an unwed mother cannot marry the actually father, then it should be another man who will accept responsibility for her and the child. And his rights and responsibilities as the father (regardless of any biological relationship) should be enforced upon the marriage. Except in special circumstances as to be determined by a judge, unwed fathers (or even divorced ones for that matter) shouldn’t be liable for any kind of child support. That’s just another bureaucratic system set up by the women’s movement to destroy the stability of families and, just as with the other new victims’ laws, has done absolutely no good to anyone. It serves nothing more than to enable the wrong-doers and finger-pointers and perpetuate a cycle of victimization. Sure, the man might “go free” without responsibility but there are other areas in life where women do the same where men can’t. It just is what it is. Men and women cannot be made equal through coercive legislation.

Unwed mothers actually had more protections when social stigma outcast them and their children than they do today. Don’t believe that? Don’t believe any of this at all that I speak about? Seek for yourself whether what I’m saying is true or not- dig deep and think critically and rationally without letting emotion overwhelm you- then go and form your own conclusions.

Every time I hear of one more case of drama, of drugs, of a girl having a baby with a man she won’t stay with and then having another baby with a subsequent man, every drug case, every rape, every sexual harassment incident, I’m reminded that society has put women into positions that allow them to be victimized and that society has removed all controls and restraints on sexuality and appropriate family arrangements that would give children and young people the proper start in life.

I don’t really care if people hate me or love me, and neither should anyone else. People who are going to hate you don’t need a reason to do so, and oftentimes you will find that even if you give in and live the life they say you should be living (ie., finding paid employment) that they will still hate you. So let those who will hate you, hate you still. Let those who will love you, love you still.

I have been different than others all my life, but that’s OK. I’ve known no other life than a truly patriarchal one where I married young and never worked. But we are the only family that is still intact that I know of that hasn’t had a whole slew of problems that are commonplace in today’s post-feminist society. He’s still my first and only husband, only one to father my child. I’ve never brought up a child in an unstable environment with illegal drugs or any other problems that are so common.

The only way to know how much worth and value a woman has in the patriarchal system as a wife and mother is to take her out of that system- that’s when all Hell erupts and it becomes clear how much the women (women like myself who have become a rarity) society looked down upon as “childish parasites” were really worth and how much good she really did, a good she could never have done competing with men out in the world and having a career and independence- a good life that feminism and the pursuit of equality cannot compete with.

Previous Related Posts on this Topic:

Victimology
The Legitimacy Principle and the Good of Patriarchy
The Wrongs of the Men’s Movement

Listen To Me, Pt. I

I’m not here to say that everything’s OK, because it’s not. I’m not trying to say that everything will be OK in the future, because perhaps it never will be. A repeated question that I have asked myself over the years goes a little something like this: Why me? Good God why me? Why am I so different from everyone else? Why am I such a freak of nature? (Because that’s how I view myself at times, though I’ve learned to embrace it and have gained more self-confidence over time.) I feel what it is that I feel inside, and it just doesn’t go away. But perhaps I’m meant to teach you, to show you a different way than what this world and society tells us. So, if you are a young woman reading this, I do want you to listen up.

And I look at the stats that this site gets oftentimes, and I get a lot of hits from search engines like Google- a ton in fact. There also seems to be a lot of interest in people searching for whether or not married women should go to work and things like that. No matter the lies the mainstream media and Hollywood try to sell us, all is most definitely NOT settled in the hearts and minds of the modern-day woman (or probably not man for that matter either). I try to do the best that I can to teach and to help, because I feel that I was made to write, made to express myself. Of course, for the life of me I can’t figure out why anyone would follow me, it seems people do. So I want to tell young girls and women just starting out in life of a different way to be and to live, to tell something different than what you are hearing all around you and to tell you that it’s OK to stay strong in those beliefs, even though I will tell you that you are going to face a lot of criticism from those around you, especially your feminist mothers and grandmothers.

I know even my own mother, as much as I love her, hates my marriage because I’ve always been dependent on my husband. They want me to be independent at all costs. My maternal grandmother also disowned me last year as well, not only for my differing religious beliefs but political ones as well. They are the type of women who you will hear wanting the goods of tradition yet boasting that “Women are becoming more independent” and saying things like “It’s still a man’s world- but all that is changing now!” Most likely these types will be Republicans and conservatives/moderates who are anti-abortion and pro-Trump supporters. They will tell you how abortion is evil and how they aren’t feminists and don’t hate men yet at the same time be like “You go girl! Get that college degree! Depend on nobody but yourself!”

Sometimes I go through this alone, it seems, and I know that there are plenty of other young women who want a different and better life than what their own mothers lived. You’ve seen their failures, their misery, their stresses, multiple marriages, and the whole juggling career/motherhood thing that just doesn’t work. They can’t seem to keep a man around, or only attract bad ones and drag them in and out of marriage counseling every other year and continuously get burned to where they eventually just give up entirely on men. But there is a different way.

I will tell you now not to waste your youth. But I don’t say this because there is some kind of “wall” where a woman loses all value once she hits a certain age- there’s NOT and don’t believe anyone who tells you there is (namely low-value men with revenge fantasies against the women who rejected them in their youth). It’s only that there is something special about bonding with a man from your youth. There’s something precious about it and relationships established during your youth cannot be replaced. Guys shouldn’t waste their youth either because it’s important for bonding, loving and building a life with someone but I’m mostly here to talk to the girls.

I was a mere 16 years old when I first met him and bonded to him and I wasn’t much older whenever we married. And since I have depended on him the entire time, I’ve never known any other life other than the one I have lived with him. It’s hard to explain how that feels. For a man, it wouldn’t be the same, but for a woman, it changes everything. I’m very soft and delicate because he’s taken care of me (but don’t think that makes me weak, because I’m anything but it). Yes, I cry. No, I’m not a child, but neither am I a man. I have emotions and I express them, but he understands that. In fact, he says that’s one of the things he loves about me. The world we live in today wants to medicate away those emotions and call them unhealthy. Abusive men seek to employ psychological techniques to try to silence a woman’s emotions and “manage” them (which only causes the situation to get completely out of hand).

But that’s not love. That’s not bonding. That is annihilating the very feminine essence that makes a woman precious and unique. He understands me like no other. I can be a handful to manage at times, but he just holds me when I cry until I calm down. After a while I stop crying because he’s calmed me and I just lean into his chest and bond to him all the more. And that bonding is also a highly a sexual bond. If I don’t desire him, then I’m not feeling bonded to him.

In the world we live in today, sex is promoted as a casual and androgynous thing, and if you, as a woman, cannot reach orgasm, then it is obviously because you don’t know enough about your body, aren’t “empowered” enough and aren’t expressing yourself enough and being vocal about your needs, etc.. etc… but I fail to see the wisdom in this mainstream bullshit- and so should you.

I’m not ashamed to cry. I’m not ashamed to want bonding and love. Last night I reached for him, desiring him, because I wanted to feel secure and loved in his arms. He didn’t have to abuse me or hurt me to make me desire or want him. In fact, it has always been quite the opposite. Yes, it’s a personal thing for sure, but I have said before that I’ve never had a problem orgasming. I’ve also said before that I don’t masturbate, I don’t engage in stupid games and role play. I don’t get all “kinky” or anything. I don’t like that stuff. It strips away, in my mind, what the real and true meaning of sex and the purpose of it is. And if you think for one moment that it’s boring or anything of the sort then you’re wrong.

I try to explain what goes on in my head, though it’s kind of hard sometimes. In my mind it’s so sweet. I was given to him when I was so young and I depended on him to protect me, provide for me and lead me. And even now, I’ve never truly known anything else. I refuse to believe that I’m some freak of nature just because I can have an orgasm! It’s funny how in the modern world women are so empowered and are supposed to be sexually liberated but most have never even had an orgasm during sex and then you see articles and talk about how maybe it’s not even natural to have one!

But it seems so natural inside. I’m just simply expressing and feeling what is feminine so deep inside of me. And the truth of the matter is that the most feminine women are emotional, don’t make any sense, and are largely dependent on a man to take care of them. That is just a fact of life. Like I’ve also said before, the thought of paid employment has always weighed heavily on my heart because it would strip away my dependence on him. It would separate me from him. It changes the game entirely and that’s why I’ve always had a problem with it. But I am by no means lazy. I work hard every day. I’m up before the sun every morning, yet I’m still feminine. I’m still dependent.

I have no obligations outside of the home, then I just submit myself to my husband and rely on him. Sex is good and beautiful and part of what makes it so is because I’ve been with him- and only him- since I was so young. I don’t like girl power positions or anything like that. I lay down and let him admire my body. It’s OK to let him inside because I know I’m safe. He gives me everything I need and it’s easy to relax in sex. It’s a psychological thing as well as an overwhelming physical thing. It’s only best when it completely overwhelms me. I can feel him so deep inside of me, and that’s what’s precious about it. It’s precious because my sexuality is precious. It’s pure and sweet and there’s nothing degrading about it. I tell him that I feel bonded to him and feeling his strength and feeling him cover me is part of what makes it relaxing, when I feel safe.

I couldn’t ever see how I could feel the same being an independent, empowered woman. I’ve never known *how* I orgasm. I just do. I just feel that I’m a woman. It’s easy to open up to the same man you’ve been with since you were young and let him inside. It’s easy to share yourself that way. I’ve seen some red-pill types try to say that it’s impossible to keep being attracted to someone in a monogamous relationship, or that only “alpha” bad-boys can make a woman “wet.” I have to wonder what planet they are living on if that’s the way they live their lives. Even more than a decade on I’m still having sex with him, still desiring him.

When traditional gender roles come into play and the man is the leader/provider/protector a woman’s husband will always also be her lover (assuming she actually does love him). She will still desire him even when he lets his guard down and acts natural. Like I love my husband for who he is, so long as he’s being the man I need him to be. If he ever started trying to employ “game” on me or anything like that it would hurt me real bad. I’d pull away from him and not trust him. I’ve said before that the fact that I depended on him created an atmosphere of passion and love where I’d always long for him- and I did. We have always been best friends, companions, lovers. I’ve cared for him in his weak moments and laughed at his dorky ones. That’s the way it’s meant to be and I feel sorry for men out there who believe that the only options in life they have to keep a woman attracted is to either be the “alpha” who keeps a harem or to constantly go from woman to woman living the single life and never settling down. I also feel sorry for women who have to play games and let men treat them badly in order to be attracted to a man.

It doesn’t have to be that way. You can be deeply fulfilled and have passion beyond your wildest dreams. It’s Ok for him to lavish gifts on me because I belong to him and he provides for me. I know he thinks I’m beautiful and that doesn’t turn me off. There’s a big difference between some “beta” chump who goes around following a woman with puppy dog eyes lavishing gifts on her in the hopes that maybe- just maybe!- he might get a yes one day and a man that lavishes gifts on a woman because she belongs to him. I remember my own husband, when talking about something, making it clear that I belong to him when we were talking about him providing for me and everything.

And I will write more in the future. I just want to try to make a few pieces to share with younger women (especially I’m trying to aim for the girls in their teenage years especially to prepare them and help them) showing them a better way and life to live. You don’t have to start having kids right away (or have any at all), but bonding and allowing yourself to be given over to a man (hopefully one close to your age, even better if you grew up with him or went to school with him, so you can grow together) to take care of you in your youthful years can give you lasting bonding/passion and a stable life that will last for decades.

To keep this post from becoming any lengthier, I’ll write more in the future to try to delve deeper into the issues of sex, bonding, femininity, etc… But for the young girls out there, don’t start having sex with multiple men and babies with more than one guy, whatever path you choose in life. It’s OK to pursue a passion or dream that you feel called inside to pursue but if you pursue college education, career and independence just simply because that’s what society has told you to do or those around you like your family are pushing and pressuring you to do so, then you may never know the truth depth of femininity and bonding with a man that comes from relying on him.

 

Other Reading:

 

Why Women Shouldn’t Work

 

Mom for President

 

http://athriftyhomemaker.blogspot.com/2016/07/the-war-on-femininity-part-2-female-role.html

 

https://insanitybytes2.wordpress.com/2015/12/31/always-listen-to-your-wife/

 

 

 

Let It Hurt

Pain and suffering I hold deep in my heart. The feminine suffers pain in the heart and in the body, sometimes caused by the masculine. That’s just the way it is. I accept it, I embrace it, even when I can hardly endure it. It’s hard sometimes to withstand such pain. But I’m a woman. I bleed and I feel and it isn’t always pretty. I don’t always make sense of what I feel or of what I say- even to myself. But I’m a woman. I’m not meant to be understood. I’m not meant to be so stable. I’ll cry. I’ll scream sometimes. I’ll terrify the living Hell out of you with the storm that brews deep inside of me. Don’t try to understand me, just be that fortress that holds strong until the storm has passed.

But would you love me any other way? If I asked you to get down on your knees and cry, to show your softer side, to be emotional, to tell me how you really feel deep inside- would you like it? Would I offend you as a man? Would I be attracted to you if you became more like a woman? You know I wouldn’t, you feel it deep inside. I’d say and insist with my words that I want you to be that way, but I’d only hate you if you truly were. I’d only be repulsed if you truly were. So don’t ask me to shut down the storm inside, even when the waves are threatening and fierce, even when they rock the boat so much that it might capsize. The storm can’t be tamed or contained, only endured. It can destroy and it can heal. It has a dark side. I’ve known this to be true. I know that I feel it on the inside. There is a dark and dangerous side to femininity, as there is a dark side to masculinity. A man in a fit of rage can be terrifying to a woman as much as he is attractive to her, because he is displaying masculinity in its most pure and raw form, as a woman does with her nurturing and her emotions.

But ladies don’t hate him because he’s a man, don’t stamp out that masculinity (and on the flip-side, don’t ever let the world stamp out that feminine light within you. It’s OK to cry and be emotional, just like it’s OK for him to be withdrawn or even a bit aggressive). Just try to understand him, to feel him. And I know. I see it all the more every day. But I also know that peace of belonging completely to somebody, of holding the love of a capable and strong man, and it was worth the pain endured.

I remember how I laughed as we sat in the park eating peaches like teenagers. I clung to his arm for reassurance and protection as we walked together along the dam. Then I turned the heads of all the men who saw me like I always do. But I was docile- I didn’t actively seek their attention. I just existed. I was just a woman, letting my light shine. I know he withdraws, I feel him when he’s about to. He needs to. I need him to. But so long as I can still feel him, so long as I still have the assurance that he’s there, so long as I still have his love. I know that need. A man has to withdraw so as not to be clingy or needy and perhaps even to work on himself to improve himself, to sort through life’s problems the way a man does. That polarity has to exist in male-female interactions and it is ultimately the man’s burden and responsibility to keep the attraction going, even if it sometimes causes panic in a woman’s mind.

I look at the world and how it seems to hate masculinity, and even popular celebrities that decry men who try to run “game” on women. Pick-up-artistry is immoral for men who care nothing for women and seek to deceive them and use them, but men are ultimately doing it for women. Men want and need women and are constantly seeking to improve themselves to get women. Men have to be the seducers, or else nobody would ever be having sex- and that’s truth.

And I think I know. I think I know that on some level the man has to hurt you. It should never be extreme or abusive or with mal intent, but there has to be some level of pain on the emotional level. Sometimes there’s even pain on a physical level. But as a woman I cling to him, need him, and want him to take care of me because he’s strong. I need him to be strong- to be all the things that I am not- but being secure in his love and commitment. No woman wants a weak man any more than a man feels that deep attraction to a masculine woman who’s just “one of the guys”- even if both will take what’s in front of them until something better comes along.

Maybe all I am saying is this- let it hurt some, but only if the man is good and true and his intentions are true. Only for a man that will really always be there for you- your husband on the sexual level and trustworthy other men in your life that you look up to. Just as men have to stay strong and endure the storm that is female emotions (even when they want to run, and many in fact will run away fearing or unable to handle it), allow the man to seduce, to work his game. But only if the intent is to have a better relationship with you, only if the intent is to make himself stronger and more attractive to you and ultimately make himself a better man in the process.

My husband would withdraw a lot and sometimes it was annoying, sometimes I even bitched about it, but I understand that I wanted him to do that some. I didn’t want to be with a woman who wanted non-stop “connection.” But I knew he was committed to me so it wasn’t a problem. So long as I could still feel him, still know he was there and was true and devoted to me and fulfilling his responsibilities towards me, it didn’t matter. He even has women he talks to all the time. I’ve seen women calling him- and I have never even once given a damn because I know he’s good and true. I don’t even have the slightest clue where he is half of the time because I let him be a man and trust in his love for me.

I’ve let the men in my life beat me down some and accepted it when it wasn’t abusive, anyway. If they were just trying to protect me, or retain authority I consented to it. I knew I was being disregarded or pushed aside and I silently consented to it, just the same as I have cried and threw my tantrums and caused some havoc and the men have dealt with it. I’m a woman. I don’t want to be a man and I know that men, no matter what they might say, don’t ultimately want women to be or act like men do. They want women to be women- and we likewise want them to be men.

A woman will test a man, to make sure he’s still there for her, to see how strong he really is. Similarly, men will also test women to see her value and worth; to see if she’ll easily give in to him or if she is worth investing in, to see if she is morally superior to him and his own (often short-term) motivations. There isn’t a single good or bad thing that men inflict upon women that women don’t inflict something similar upon men in return- and that’s life.

Nonetheless, it’s a woman’s burden to weed out what a man’s true intentions are. Many manosphere men are damaged, and they attract damaged women in return. In the end they have nothing. You don’t want men like that and you don’t want to be the kind of woman these men attract and abuse. But don’t be annoyed or angry when he runs game, just filter out the intentions behind it. Men run game to be attractive; to be able to get and keep women- especially women of high value who value themselves and guard their sexuality.

Men are difficult, but so are women. I just tell all the women who read my words what I discover as I go through life, what I see in the world around me and the things I have learned and the things I’ve understood. Understand men and why they act as they do. There are bad men you can’t trust to be sure and men you should protect yourself from (and seek protection from). And that’s our burden, and a heavy burden our sexuality can be to bear at times! I know I feel it every day. I feel the burden of it and sometimes it really sucks. Sometimes being a woman is hard, so very hard and painful. But if a man loves you then you can endure the pain masculinity can sometimes cause, just as a man in love will endure a woman’s words (that she often times doesn’t mean, at least not in the way they come out of her mouth) and emotions, no matter how cutting or frantic.

The Needs of My Heart Are A Two-Tiered Thing

But the needs of my heart are indeed a two-tiered thing. It is not enough solely for a man to be masculine, though him being masculine is indeed necessary. The stereotypical masculine characteristics, such as strength, decisiveness, aggression, dominance, etc… are necessary for attraction, much in the same way that feminine traits are also necessary for attraction. A man can be masculine, a man can be “alpha,” but that alone is not enough for me to open myself to him. After all, many men can be described as “alpha,” but that doesn’t mean anything. When I perceive that a man is a threat to me in some way, or that he might do me wrong or doesn’t even respect me, etc… I can feel my body closing up. It is my instincts, telling me not to allow this man in- and this is a good thing.

Women crave masculinity in men. In the modern society the majority of women, however, are getting masculinity in unhealthy ways. They might chase after the jerk or the bad-boy- men who might indeed be considered “alpha” or masculine- and in doing so obtain the masculinity they need and crave, but they miss out on the other part of the equation- the part of the equation that is necessary to be truly content and fulfilled in the deepest of ways- and that part of the equation is also love, the part where a man cherishes and loves a woman for who she is, for everything about her that makes her feminine.

I’ve always considered the concept of coverture- the old legal doctrine where husband and wife are one, where the wife is fully covered by the husband, in so much where she is considered by law and society to be a “covered woman” as the ideal. In the real world he covers me, as he also does in the sex act. The doctrine of coverture considered both husband and wife to be one in life and legal matters, the same as we are one when we join our bodies. And I feel it, when I am lying there under him. I don’t need a bunch of tricks or games, and as I have said before I am never degraded. I can open myself up and fully relax, fully let go, because I am secure in his love for me. I just relax and allow him to lead and I feel pleasure, pleasure that I can only describe as “sweet.” I have both the masculinity and security that I crave being under both the influence and protection of a dominant man.

But let’s give the scenario that a man is masculine, but the equation of love and commitment is not there. I feel the initial stirrings of attraction to the man because he is dominant. Let’s say he drags me off all Clint Eastwood style (a terrible example that I am loathe to use, but an example nonetheless) and “ravishes” me. OK, he’s proved his dominance. He’s the “alpha male,” but if he doesn’t love me and is not truly committed to me then I am only being used and degraded and will be left alone and broken in the end. I could never fully allow myself to open up to a man in such a way, and indeed, on top of having trouble reaching orgasm during intercourse in the first place, women are only half as likely to do so during any kind of casual sexual encounters with a man. Most women don’t orgasm during sex, and I do think this is more of a psychological thing. They can’t truly let go (even I cannot orgasm if I don’t feel secure and controlled, when I can’t truly “let go”). They have lost their feminine selves in the pursuit of equality with men. It is the deepest of all psychological needs of a female, to depend upon and submit to a dominant male, and it is also the deepest of all human needs- to love and be loved in return.

In life he is stronger than me. It doesn’t bother me to give up any rights I might have had as a single woman and live under the authority of a man. It’s OK in my mind if I cannot act legally without his consent. I chose him because I love him, and why would I not want to truly be one with him in every way? It’s OK if he is my voice and speaks for me and makes the decisions for the family. It allows me to feel secure and cherished and taken care of.

Perhaps our ancestors knew something about life and human nature that we today have forgotten or refuse to see. Perhaps these women weren’t so “oppressed” as we are led to believe. A system such as coverture would not have lasted if women had simply refused to accept it- but accept it they did. They accepted it because it created peace and harmony between the sexes, stabilized marriage, family life and male-female relationships. But I suspect these women were much more content than any of us know today, because we only hear about the women who “misbehaved” and rebelled. We don’t know what the other women were thinking or feeling, except for in the very few written records that exist (where they claimed contentment and felt loved by their men). It’s not like they were out publicly having discussions about orgasms.

Back to the ravishment situation, we’ll say now that the dominant man is my husband. He’s masculine, showing assertiveness and aggression- the necessary components for attraction- but this go around I know he is committed to me. In this case I can relax, open up fully and let go. It’s OK if I reach for him, because I want and desire him. I crave him and can reach for him, wanting all of him and more, ever more. I can wrap my arms around him and urge him on, or I can just relax and close my eyes and simply enjoy him shamelessly. There’s nothing to feel ashamed about and it is a private act. I can relax and just let him lead me. It’s OK to enjoy it. It’s OK to love the way he feels and like what he’s doing. I feel a sweetness deep in my belly and I smile in my joy and contentment. He’s strong and I love to admire the way he feels, but I also know I am loved and cherished, that I am secure. When he’s done, wherever he goes, I know he’ll be coming right back to me. He’s still my covering, providing me with all the necessaries in life even after he has withdrawn from me. He’s still my protection and I can always come to him. And many times over the years I have come up to him and tugged him on the arm, telling him what I need and he has listened to me and welcomed me in his arms, in his love.

It’s not a dirty thing, that I love the feeling afterwards that it’s like his essence is still there inside of me. I feel cherished and loved for all the things that uniquely make me female. I feel content that he is the one and only one to ever touch me. He provides that protection and covering over me.

On the flip-side, a man might still provide for a woman and be her covering, but if she is not loved and cherished by the man (such as might be the case in a harem, or with a rich man and beautiful woman much younger than him when either party is only in the relationship for what one can get out of the other), then she is still just being used and degraded. I want to know that he sees who I am as a female, loves me for me, loves every inch of how I’m made, from the generous bounty of my breasts, to the weakness of my arms, the softness of my voice and of my curves, to the way I was designed to give and carry life. I want to know that I hold him captive in my love, beauty and femininity.

And yet again, there is another side to this equation. There is the circumstance where a man genuinely loves and cherishes a woman, yet he is not masculine- he is not dominant and he does not lead. This situation again creates a deep discontentment. The dominant man without love for the woman exerts masculinity in an abusive and tyrannical way against the woman, but the man who loves without being dominant robs the woman of her deep need to rely upon a strong man to protect and lead her. And I do know this one. When I felt he no longer led me, I ran somewhat wild. I was confused inside and deeply hurt. I cried, I temporarily took on paid employment, I never wanted to be home. Our marriage and family life fell to shreds because the natural order had been overturned. But I tried. I left notes trying to explain how I felt and what I needed, hoping he would find them. And at the end, when things calmed down and he finally started becoming the man he needed to be again, order was restored, but there was and potentially always will be, some hurt that won’t heal and wounds that have left deep scars that will forever remain.

I asked him why he would have just let me go; why he didn’t step up to be the man that I needed him to be. And I cried, and sometimes still cry, whenever I ask him the question “Why?” He thought if he just gave me independence and let me do my own thing- that if he just let me go- that I would be happy, and that was the mistake he made, much like the passive male of the 1950s created discontentment that led to women’s lib and the destruction of family life, male-female relationships and the overall social order, his passivity in stepping down from the leadership role was disastrous in the same exact way, causing problems that ripped our family and lives apart.

I didn’t want independence whenever I separated myself from him. I wanted to be led. I wanted to depend on him. I wanted him to be a man and be strong once again, to be the man I had chosen so long ago. I needed that masculinity that is expressed in a healthy and beneficial way. Because with it I am whole and complete. Because I can just relax when he leads and covers me. I can open up and be content and feel overwhelming joy, happiness and pleasure- both of a physical and psychological nature. When he gives me gifts, he is showing that he cherishes me and will provide me with the things I need. When he leads me, he is telling me that everything is OK. I don’t have to worry about anything. The natural order is set right and no amount of money, no independence or paycheck can ever give that true happiness and contentment. And isn’t true happiness, love and contentment the greatest of all the things one might achieve in this life?

 

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