A Woman’s Needs

“The center of a woman’s happiness in marriage is to be loved- but the center of a man’s is to be admired.” – Helen B. Andelin 

It’s well known that a man has needs. A good wife fulfills those needs. A good wife takes care of the children, the home, greets her husband at the door, feeds him home-cooked meals, gives him sex regularly, makes him feel like a man… If she doesn’t fulfill those needs then her husband strays and it’s all her fault…

Yet the woman stays home every day, keeps herself in good shape, makes her home pretty, faithfully attends to her duties…And all the while she waits…

Every once in a while she wants to let her hair fall down her back, to dress up pretty and be appreciated. The heels on her feet, the stockings so carefully rolled up her legs, the powdered face and rouged lips, the cinched in waist and minidress…An investment that gives no return…Nobody’s around to see it, to appreciate it. To sit there for hours looking pretty but getting nothing but a headache in return for all her attention to detail. On the weekends she hopes he’ll notice her, that he’ll take her out. She waits all day but nobody ever sees her, ever notices her. At the end of the day she resigns herself once again to her fate, washes the makeup off and never expects anything will ever change. It’s all been a waste. Might as well let the house get dirty and the dishes pile up in the sink and not worry about the mascara streaks down her face from where she’s cried so much…Her makeup’s ruined now but it’s not like he’d notice. He’ll never take her out this weekend or the next. He’s never done so but maybe once or twice in all these years…

The longing desire for happiness, for attention, to be shown off every once in a while. The desire to be loved. The desire for once to get a break from the constant housework, the bleeding hands and the noisy and messy children… But for her there is no escape. She fulfills his needs but he never has time for hers. Either he doesn’t understand or he doesn’t care that she needs more than what he’s giving.

Like most men he doesn’t get it and if she draws away from him it’s some big shocker that he never saw coming. It’s almost a point of pride for a man to exclaim that he doesn’t understand a woman, but it’s really not all that hard. She just wants him but he always has something better to do… She doesn’t want some fool that dotes on her every word- no she’d be disgusted at him for that and think him less of a man. But she wants to feel like a woman, she wants to be loved and appreciated. Just as much as he wants the chance to be a man she wants the chance to be a woman. He may provide for her physical needs, but emotionally he deprives her.

And the winter days fade to spring and the spring days blossom bright and hot into summer. Yet she still sits there, pretty and waiting for something that’s never going to come…

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