Men are Self-Made Victims

The MRA mantra: “My flight from male responsibility has come back around to bite me in the a**”

It’s a common theme among MRAs and men today to complain about women not taking “responsibility” (ie, not taking on men’s responsibilities) yet also to complain about divorce, promiscuity and child support. Apparently, men are even complaining about women not paying for dates these days. (1) They want women to be independent and take on their traditional responsibilities, yet they complain when these same independent women divorce them and cheat on them.

Now how am I supposed to feel sorry for these men? Simply put, I don’t feel sorry for them. They wouldn’t be having these problems if they accepted traditional male responsibilities for providing for and protecting women in the first place. But, since they reject these responsibilities and instead want women to share in them they now have to pay the price for it- and they don’t like it one bit.

Study after study has shown that independent women are more likely to cheat and initiate divorce. It’s not even debatable anymore. The more independent the wife, the more likely she is to do her husband wrong. Yet, men today, while complaining about the sour deal they’ve apparently gotten from feminism, still refuse to accept traditional responsibilities. The truth of the matter is that they are responsible for feminism. It was- and still is- a movement that promised them they would no longer have to carry the traditional male burdens alone but that instead women would share in them. Their movement today is about nothing more than complaining about the price they have to pay for supporting feminism, female promiscuity and breadwinner wives.

Women’s willingness to engage in casual sex with them without commitment is fun- until, of course, the men have to pay for the illegitimate children and don’t get a say in abortion. Then, all of a sudden they are “victims.” Claiming rights to illegitimate children is fun for them because they don’t have to take responsibility to have these rights. But, of course, it always comes back around to bite them in the backside when another man can intrude himself into his household when he has a family of his own. (2)

Women’s willingness to carry half of the financial burden is fun- until, of course, men can only stand by and watch when their wives file for divorce and take the kids. Then, of course, the men, once happy with women sharing in their burdens, are “victims.” But, hey, their wives don’t *need* them anymore so what is to stop them from filing for divorce? You men wanted them independent and now they are. If you don’t like this turn of events there’s only one way to stop it… (3)

Maybe by now you get my point. Men today are certainly facing injustices, but they are, in fact, self-made victims. Women today are self-made victims as well. They complain about irresponsible men but women are the ones who have made men that way. If men get what they want outside of marriage (sex, paternal rights) then women can’t have security in marriage nor can they expect men will be too overly willing to be breadwinners. Women can’t claim independent status then expect men to protect them. Of course women today don’t always want protection from men nor support and it does in the end come back around to hurt them. Feminists in the name of “all women” sold women out. MRAs, in the name of “all men” have sold men out.

Men wanted to be free from financial responsibilities for women and the traditional duties of men such as the draft. Women wanted to be independent and sexually “free.” Now both sexes pay the price for it.

Somebody asked me once if I was against “men’s rights.” The simple answer is that I am for men’s rights, but only when attached to it comes men’s responsibility. I am wholly against the MRA version of men’s rights because they want both the goods of feminism and the goods of tradition. Men today want (and increasingly have) rights without responsibility. But not all of the rights they once had, of course. They can’t expect to get a say over their wives bodies’ when they don’t have to support her for life or can instead demand support from her. I am in favor of husbands (not boyfriends or sexual partners) having a say in birth control and abortion but only when attached to it comes the responsibility to forever support their wives. If the wife carries his burdens then, in my opinion, the husband does not deserve such rights. The original deal for men sharing in the reproductive life of a woman was that they offer up financial support. Men have broken that deal thus what is their argument for getting a say in reproduction?

Men, of course, were the ones who made feminism possible because they have always held the majority of political and economic power. They supported feminism because it was a good deal for them- until it all blew up in their faces.

Plain and simple- men’s rights must come with men’s responsibility. And if you men have come so far in rejecting responsibility for women that you can’t even pay for a simple date then what does that say about you? You’ve already shown the woman from the beginning that you have no intention of taking care of her, providing for her, or treating her any different than you would your guy friends, so why should she respect you or give up anything for you?

And, girls, a man’s willingness (or not) to pay for dates is a good indicator of what kind of a husband he will be. If he won’t pay for the date, dump him. Plain and simple. After all, what happens if you do marry him or get pregnant (even if you aren’t planning on having kids)? Dating a man gives you an opportunity to see his true character. Putting him to the test (does he pay for dates? Will he leave if I turn him down for sex?) will tell you whether or not you should continue seeing him. Be true to your own morals and remember that being sexually faithful (in marriage!) is the woman’s responsibility.

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3 thoughts on “Men are Self-Made Victims

  1. I once knew a MRA who stated that he was so traditional that he sometimes believed he belonged in the medieval ages. This traditional man:
    1. Didn’t pay for me on our first and only date, but claimed to be very generous;
    2. Stated that if he were to get married, he’d get the woman to sign a prenup (even though he had hardly a penny to his name and earned a below average wage in his mid 30s);
    3. Stated that it was important for the woman to take the man’s surname as it’s the cornerstone patriarchy and patriarchy is the cornerstone of civilisation (big words, but I guess he missed the memo about how paying for women is part of the patriarchal structure);
    4. For every child that his wife birthed, he’d demand a paternity test to make sure the child was his, because women cheat (so do men, but men don’t have pregnancy to show for it, so he’s penalising a woman’s ability to get pregnant);
    5. Believed women should be stay-at-home mothers but then implied that women don’t actually do anything at home and just leech off men’s money (women can’t win either way);
    6. Claimed that women are big girls and should take responsibility for themselves and shouldn’t depend on men protecting them, as that implies she has a princess mentality;
    7. Constantly talked about a woman’s age and fertility, and how women younger than 30 are more desirable than women 30 and older, despite the fact that he was in his mid 30s, ugly looking and bitter and bald and scratching his head over why he was still single;
    8. Lamented about how there are hardly any feminine women around when he was hardly masculine himself. He acted like a woman many times and even partook in hobbies that are dominated by females. He even boasted about how a test revealed that he’s more “emotionally sensitive” than 95% of men. If by emotionally sensitive he means breaking down and crying a lot (which he did), then he’s emotionally sensitive;
    9. Was equally guilty of the things he accuses feminists of, such as whinging, being bitter, arguing for advantage rather than equality, claiming to be oppressed, turning issues into a men vs women battle, rejecting responsibilities, accusing feminists of being prejudiced against men when he himself was prejudiced against women, etc.

    Ladies, form a queue.

    Basically he cherry-picked the traditional bits that were beneficial for him, and was quite happy to reject tradition where it was too inconvenient for him. If this is representative of a typical MRA, then I weep for the future of humanity.

    1. I dated that guy, he also lacked in conversational skills and just wanted a wife_mother!

      Another great article, at least we figured out where the problems lie.

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