The MRA mantra: “My flight from male responsibility has come back around to bite me in the a**”
It’s a common theme among MRAs and men today to complain about women not taking “responsibility” (ie, not taking on men’s responsibilities) yet also to complain about divorce, promiscuity and child support. Apparently, men are even complaining about women not paying for dates these days. (1) They want women to be independent and take on their traditional responsibilities, yet they complain when these same independent women divorce them and cheat on them.
Now how am I supposed to feel sorry for these men? Simply put, I don’t feel sorry for them. They wouldn’t be having these problems if they accepted traditional male responsibilities for providing for and protecting women in the first place. But, since they reject these responsibilities and instead want women to share in them they now have to pay the price for it- and they don’t like it one bit.
Study after study has shown that independent women are more likely to cheat and initiate divorce. It’s not even debatable anymore. The more independent the wife, the more likely she is to do her husband wrong. Yet, men today, while complaining about the sour deal they’ve apparently gotten from feminism, still refuse to accept traditional responsibilities. The truth of the matter is that they are responsible for feminism. It was- and still is- a movement that promised them they would no longer have to carry the traditional male burdens alone but that instead women would share in them. Their movement today is about nothing more than complaining about the price they have to pay for supporting feminism, female promiscuity and breadwinner wives.
Women’s willingness to engage in casual sex with them without commitment is fun- until, of course, the men have to pay for the illegitimate children and don’t get a say in abortion. Then, all of a sudden they are “victims.” Claiming rights to illegitimate children is fun for them because they don’t have to take responsibility to have these rights. But, of course, it always comes back around to bite them in the backside when another man can intrude himself into his household when he has a family of his own. (2)
Women’s willingness to carry half of the financial burden is fun- until, of course, men can only stand by and watch when their wives file for divorce and take the kids. Then, of course, the men, once happy with women sharing in their burdens, are “victims.” But, hey, their wives don’t *need* them anymore so what is to stop them from filing for divorce? You men wanted them independent and now they are. If you don’t like this turn of events there’s only one way to stop it… (3)
Maybe by now you get my point. Men today are certainly facing injustices, but they are, in fact, self-made victims. Women today are self-made victims as well. They complain about irresponsible men but women are the ones who have made men that way. If men get what they want outside of marriage (sex, paternal rights) then women can’t have security in marriage nor can they expect men will be too overly willing to be breadwinners. Women can’t claim independent status then expect men to protect them. Of course women today don’t always want protection from men nor support and it does in the end come back around to hurt them. Feminists in the name of “all women” sold women out. MRAs, in the name of “all men” have sold men out.
Men wanted to be free from financial responsibilities for women and the traditional duties of men such as the draft. Women wanted to be independent and sexually “free.” Now both sexes pay the price for it.
Somebody asked me once if I was against “men’s rights.” The simple answer is that I am for men’s rights, but only when attached to it comes men’s responsibility. I am wholly against the MRA version of men’s rights because they want both the goods of feminism and the goods of tradition. Men today want (and increasingly have) rights without responsibility. But not all of the rights they once had, of course. They can’t expect to get a say over their wives bodies’ when they don’t have to support her for life or can instead demand support from her. I am in favor of husbands (not boyfriends or sexual partners) having a say in birth control and abortion but only when attached to it comes the responsibility to forever support their wives. If the wife carries his burdens then, in my opinion, the husband does not deserve such rights. The original deal for men sharing in the reproductive life of a woman was that they offer up financial support. Men have broken that deal thus what is their argument for getting a say in reproduction?
Men, of course, were the ones who made feminism possible because they have always held the majority of political and economic power. They supported feminism because it was a good deal for them- until it all blew up in their faces.
Plain and simple- men’s rights must come with men’s responsibility. And if you men have come so far in rejecting responsibility for women that you can’t even pay for a simple date then what does that say about you? You’ve already shown the woman from the beginning that you have no intention of taking care of her, providing for her, or treating her any different than you would your guy friends, so why should she respect you or give up anything for you?
And, girls, a man’s willingness (or not) to pay for dates is a good indicator of what kind of a husband he will be. If he won’t pay for the date, dump him. Plain and simple. After all, what happens if you do marry him or get pregnant (even if you aren’t planning on having kids)? Dating a man gives you an opportunity to see his true character. Putting him to the test (does he pay for dates? Will he leave if I turn him down for sex?) will tell you whether or not you should continue seeing him. Be true to your own morals and remember that being sexually faithful (in marriage!) is the woman’s responsibility.