Support, Protection and Love

I really do not like to be where I am now. I’m certainly not what you would call happy but things could be worse. He takes care of me. He supports me and keeps me safe from everything going on in the society today. I would rather be with a man who takes care of me, even if I am not exactly happy than I would be out on my own and having to fend for myself. A woman will always love and follow after a man who protects her.

I’m not here all because of love. Don’t get me wrong I love my husband very much but love could never be enough to keep me here. In a lot of ways I don’t have a lot of choices. I’ve never made money of my own in the marriage so I don’t know exactly how I could go about leaving even if I really wanted to. I don’t want to go out and be independent or have a job or anything. Sometimes I get frustrated and nothing seems to go right around the house and everything just irritates me and dealing with a child exasperates me but I still am happier here at home than I would be out in the world.

I don’t think that I could feel love towards a man if he didn’t support me or protect me. If he didn’t support me then I’m not even sure I would understand what the marriage was even for, or better yet what a husband was even worth. That’s just the truth. It’s not politically correct and it may not even be nice. But it is, nonetheless, the truth. There is nothing unique nor special that men bring to marriage or a relationship unless they are providers and protectors. Nothing. That’s just the way it is. If they are not providers and protectors then they are expendable and women don’t need them. This is probably the prime reason why marriage is considered by many to be irrelevant. If I was already in the workforce and already independent then there would really be nothing to lose by just simply leaving.

What can I say? I guess I’m just too weak to make it on my own. But my weakness is also my power. My weakness draws a man towards me to protect me and take care of me. My weakness forms a true union of being one. It forms a bond of two people living one life, instead of two people living separate lives.

So yes it is really money and provision that keeps me here. I would rather lay down in a warm bed every night and be taken care of and have food to eat and a decent place to live and be sheltered from the harshness of the world even if it means that I’m not always happy.

If he ever closed his wallet I’d surely close my legs. But before you think me a gold-digging b*tch maybe you should consider the alternatives that male-female relationships take in the modern world.You’ll probably find that there is no better way. I don’t care about my husband being rich. The only thing I demand is that he provide for me all the necessities. However, if he can buy me something extra on occasion I’m happy with it.

I would rather be loved and cherished. I’d rather be secure than liberated. That’s just who I am. I can be whiny, needy, b*tchy and mean but I’d never be unfaithful. Men will put up with a lot of things from their women except unfaithfulness. Likewise, I can put up with him being a jerk and many other things so long as he takes care of me.

I love and want him because he takes care of me. His support and protection liberates me.

Posted in Commentary, Personal Relationships | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

And We Women, We Are Beings of Intuition

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Critical Thoughts on Abortion

The taking of any life is always a “killing.” In the case of abortion it is obviously a killing of what is, or has the potential to be, life. But the question is is it murder and is it right? As a society we justify many killings. We execute other humans when they have done something that we as a society see to be wrong. When we kill out of self-defense the society determines if it was justified or if it is punishable as a crime. We put down our animals when they are sick. When a killing is acceptable or when it is murder is always something that varies depending on what society you live in and what time period you are in. In the past the rapist and the horse thief got the rope, but now the death penalty is considered too severe for such crimes.

Thoughts and feelings on abortion run deep. The only argument I ever hear against abortion is that it is murder. Many even go so far as to say that it is never acceptable, even if the woman has been raped or continuing the pregnancy will kill her. No matter her circumstances it should be illegal, no matter what. Then the argument goes that she can hand the child over to adoption as if this is always a realistic solution for women. Not only must she carry the pregnancy to term but, it’s ok, she can always just hand the child over to someone else and give it up even after carrying it inside of her body for nine months and risking her life and going through hours of labor to bring it into the world. As if that is somehow a more “humane” situation for either mother or child.

And what if the father doesn’t consent to adoption? The mother might still give up her rights but that will not stop the father from being able to hassle her in court. Feminism has also opened up to men access to women’s incomes which gives immoral men incentive to harass the mother. Even if the father is not married to the mother and has made it clear he doesn’t want anything to do with the child he can still walk in and change his mind later and give mother and child 18 years (or how ever many years are left after his absence) of hardship and drag her constantly in and out of court. Not to mention he can overturn the adoption later on upsetting the welfare of the child and undoing the mother’s decision to place her child with a loving and stable family.

What about the woman who’s husband has abandoned her while pregnant? What about the young woman who’s boyfriend has pressured her into sex she doesn’t really want? What about the young woman who agrees to go off alone with a guy but doesn’t want to go that far with him? Forget about rape. If anybody sees her willingly go with him the case probably won’t even be brought to trial but probably thrown out in the name of “justice” or something. Studies on abortion show that half of all women say they have abortions because of relationship issues with the child’s father. These women are not all single promiscuous women who are just acting “irresponsible.” A lot of these women are even married. One would think the irresponsible woman should have an abortion anyways but I guess a child brought into an unstable environment where there might be drugs, abuse, neglect or who only knows what is better than abortion.

Those who are against it act as if it is a one-sided issue. The only thing that matters is that the fetus is a life and the taking of that life is murder under all circumstances. Then there are those who say it can be justified if her life is at stake or if she was raped. So what this says is that, in a society that wants the government out of their health care, the decision for abortion should be left up to the state (or federal government) or some quack doctor to determine if the medical procedure of abortion should be allowed. Most abortions occur within the first trimester by way of taking a pill that terminates a pregnancy like a miscarriage but if she must get a judicial waiver for it too much time might pass that a surgical abortion (which pro-lifers consider barbaric and inhumane) might then become necessary. Unlike issues such as divorce, pregnancy is a very time-sensitive issue.

Most women who are raped simply want the thing done with. They want to go on with their lives but if abortion were illegal and she finds out she is pregnant as a result of the rape her ability to have an abortion will depend upon her not only bringing the rapist to trial but getting him convicted. She must now report the rape. If she reports the rape only upon finding out she has conceived as a result of the act the society will say she is just “crying rape” to cover up her “bad behavior” (men, of course, have no responsibility as obviously the woman got herself pregnant and she is solely to blame for the situation). Now the case goes to trial where she must be put upon the witness stand to face her rapist- to look him in the eyes and have all the sordid details of the event related over and over and brought into the public eye and her moral character attacked over and over. The man’s role in sex is to overpower the woman and thrust into her body the only question then becomes “did she really want it?” It is never the rapist that is on trial but the raped. And what if he does not get convicted even if he’s guilty (which is a highly likely scenario)?

Let’s call this what it is. Society’s acceptance of abortion in the case of rape is an issue of unauthorized paternity. The fetus is still innocent but the abortion is OK because of the father’s sins, because the father did something immoral, because the father was irresponsible, because the man didn’t have the right to plant his seed there. Looked at from this light would abortion not then become an issue of men vs. men? If abortion has always been a major feminist issue would feminism, often seen by society as men vs. women, not itself actually be an issue of men vs. men (and the women who help them so that they might vanquish their own enemies- other women)?

Take the trial of the bitter waters described in the Bible in Numbers 5. Many interpret these verses to be about abortion. The woman’s husband is overcome by jealousy because he believes his wife has been unfaithful and is pregnant by another man. The Bible, despite some modern day interpretations, is a patriarchal text. Women are under the control of husbands and husbands have strict obligations towards their wives (including providing for them). The husband is bringing a case against his wife in these verses but the real conflict is actually a power struggle between him and another man.

A person cannot be forced to donate an organ, their blood or any part of their body to another human being even if it would mean saving the person’s life. Does a woman not have such a right over her own being and person? Or is she not a person? Does the right over one’s own body and being not extend to a woman’s bodily organs? Does the state have the right to compel a woman to give her fallopian tubes, her uterus, her vagina, her blood, her entire body to be used to support and house the development of a potential life? Does she not have the right to refuse medical examinations and procedures or can she be compelled against her will and lose all rights over her body and dignity?

Say a person is acting irresponsible by doing something like drinking and driving. Then the person wrecks and harms another person. As far as I am aware the perpetrator still cannot be compelled under the law to donate any part of his/her body or blood to keep the other person alive. Despite the irresponsible behavior, his (or her) body is still his (or her) own. Yes the perpetrator can be punished for breaking the law and harming someone else but his body is still his own and even upon his death he cannot be compelled to give any part of his body even to save the life of another. Does this not apply to a woman’s body? Should women be “punished” for irresponsible behavior and have to continue a pregnancy to term against her will in a society that has outlawed slavery for over 150 years? People can still, under the Constitution, be compelled to perform labor for punishment of a crime. Has the woman committed a crime? What crime? Should the father not also be punished for being an accomplice to said crime? Do we really want to live in a society like that?

All societies have an interest in protecting human life (and increasingly many species of animal life) but a just and fair society takes into account all parties and does what is right for all parties involved. It is not all about the fetus. There are also the rights of a woman over her own body and right to life and the pursuit of happiness. There are also the rights of society. There is also the issue of if the fetus has rights or not. All laws restrict human behavior. They have to for society to function properly but the American way is “justice for all” and solely focusing on one party does not do justice to all. Every single pregnancy could potentially permanently or temporarily injure, disfigure or even kill a woman. Every single pregnancy has the potential to rob a woman of her life and her dreams- or does that not matter? Is she not a citizen with the right to the pursuit of life, liberty and happiness?

Being that it is often seen as a moral issue and the state does have an interest in protecting life it is perfectly reasonable that the state not pay for it (except in certain circumstances). It is also reasonable that after a certain point more legal rights be given to the unborn. So we could say in the early months the rights of the woman over her own body are paramount and later on the fetus is given more legal consideration. It is also reasonable that the procedure be regulated just the same as other medical care is.

Tell me will the church take in all the hundreds of thousands of unwanted children who will come into this world if abortion is outlawed? (This was actually the way in the Middle Ages as bastard children were considered to be the children of nobody and became the wards of the church; legitimate children were the responsibility of their fathers.) Will the church feed, clothe, house and raise to adulthood all those children? Will the society that restricts abortion pay for the children to be born and raised out of the taxpayer’s money? (Conservatives don’t like that one too much.) Who will come forward to protect and support the women and children or must women and children be left on their own?

The Bible talks about love, not killing the innocent, God knowing us before we were born and numbering the hairs on our head, etc… This is probably showing that God is all wise and understands things human beings do not (actually the Bible mentions this several times) and that, yes, creation is loved and precious. But the Bible does not specifically mention abortion, nor does it mention how many children each family should have or say that each family must have as many as God will possibly give them. It says God hates “the shedding of innocent blood” but what constitutes murder and the shedding of “innocent blood” is, once again, always determined by the current mores of the society and the Bible leaves no specific instructions on this issue. Abortion was never even an issue before first-wave feminism and even the church was ok with it up until the “quickening.” Society always translates its religious texts in accordance with modern day beliefs no matter the issue.

By saying that one person’s rights end where another’s begin is to say that a woman ceases to have rights upon conception, that she ceases to be a human being with rights to her own privacy, dignity and bodily autonomy. She becomes nothing more than a vessel that doesn’t matter and all rights and decisions are taken away from her to benefit another. That doesn’t sound very just to me.

In my own personal life I would have never considered abortion but I always knew that every woman’s circumstances are different and I respected that. I didn’t want anything to do with either helping or stopping a woman from abortion, but I respected their personal decisions. And, likewise, times have changed and so have I. When I was young it was so easy to have a baby and life was grand. But I know that I could never feel now the way I did then. I could never feel secure nor safe because in the back of my mind I know I’m not. Our society today doesn’t even grant to mothers even the most basic of protections. Will we compel women to bear children against their will then endure grueling battles just to simply keep those children by their side and in their arms? Do we really think it’s better to force women to carry pregnancies to term and then lose their children via adoption despite the emotional trauma that might last a lifetime? Is there not a person who will stand up in defense of women and children as a special class with special circumstances needing special protections? Will the men of this society not be responsible for their women?

So you say there’s always birth control. But birth control fails. Studies find that half of all pregnancies are unintended and half of the women seeking abortions were using birth control that failed them. Are you to say she was irresponsible? Do you know what her circumstances are? Will you who chooses to judge her situation lend a hand to help her? You want to force her to bear a child so will you be the one who supports and raises it? Anything that would decrease the prevalence of abortion is to be desired but many pro-life advocates even believe most types of birth control are murderous because they stop implantation.

If the husband is made head of household does he not have the right then to take care of his own and limit the size of his household? Will the society enter the marriage bed and force his wife to continue to term unwanted pregnancies that he will have to pay for? What about special circumstances like adultery? What about a pregnant woman who is facing a divorce or who’s husband has run out on her? What about a 15 year old girl who was raped by her uncle or a man twice her age? What about the woman who thought her boyfriend loved her but when she gets pregnant he dumps her calling her a slut and saying it’s not even his child? Will these women need to make their personal lives public and be put on trial to obtain abortions despite the special circumstances of their personal lives and despite the bad situation having a baby would put both mother and child in? Are we to say the young girls and women don’t matter and that the fetus is life so who cares no abortions just bear the babies against their will in physical and emotional hardship then lose them or raise them in insecurity, poverty and desolation?

Could the drastic increase in laws restricting abortion in the last few years really be about upping the birth rate? But is it not the communist and totalitarian governments that regulate women’s wombs in such a way by either forcing them to have or not have babies via forced sterilizations, abortions or restricting access to reproductive services? Will a criminal investigation be started for every miscarriage?

The pro-life position is that the blastocyst, zygote, fetus, etc… is fully human. It’s a life. Plain and simple. It’s the only life that should be given consideration. That potential life is all that matters and the rights, needs and circumstances of everybody else concerned be damned.

The Traditional Family is the Solution to Abortion

Resources:

Induced Abortion in the United States

Abortion in American History

Posted in Current Events, Opinion Pieces | Tagged , | 6 Comments

Falling Birth Rates and the Importance of the Traditional Wife and Mother

Sex Education in Europe Turns to Urging More Births

So let me get this straight…You want us girls to do our “duty” and have babies to save the future of a civilization that has been telling us for decades now that we are not doing our part or duty by having babies..? It can’t possibly be that women in the home bearing and caring for children might have been fundamental for society to function properly? But we can’t admit that. That would be politically incorrect!

One word: SECURITY

There’s no WAY I’d consider having kids with the way things are today. Fix the family, fix society.

Posted in Commentary, Current Events | Tagged , | 4 Comments

Commenting on This Site

I have had many fans comment and email me asking me about commenting on my site. A couple of years ago I shut down commenting and even removed the comments that used to be on this blog. I actually do regret this in a way, but what’s done is done. Given the requests for commenting I have received from those who follow and support this blog I have decided to allow comments once again on most of my posts.

However hostile feminists and MRAs are NOT welcome on this site and I will NOT be publishing your comments. All comments are moderated so anything hostile towards traditional women, slanderous, offensive, or (should this really have to be said?) illegal will not be published.

Many thanks,

The Radical One

Posted in Updates | 4 Comments

Why I Write

First and foremost, my first caring is about my own life and that of my family. But I do care about this society that we live in. I don’t read the news hardly ever nor do I even care who’s running for president. It’s all the same to me. I try to stay off the internet except to do my shopping or check up on the blogs I link to or like to read. I know that I am different and that I have always been. I have never fit in with the crowd and I probably never will. But that doesn’t matter to me. I am who I am and if others don’t accept me then that’s their problem. Even the most seemingly insignificant things in life serve a purpose and without them there could be no balance and harmony in the universe.

When I first started writing I never dreamed I would ever build up a little community on the Web or that I would attract any attention at all. How many hits I have gotten on this site has been simply astounding to me. I know that there are a few of my friends and relatives that know about my site, although I cannot know how often or if they ever read what I write. If they like me that’s great, but if not then I do not care.

Although I will not start uncomfortable or controversial political topics with others, I will stand up for what I believe no matter who likes it or who doesn’t. If you want to ask me what I believe then I’ll tell you. Throughout history humans have been persecuted for what they believe. Many have even given their life for their faith and their beliefs. We live in a society that tells us to be who we are and we are told that we must accept everyone’s beliefs and everyone’s way of life- but what they really mean is that we must live and believe as they do. Nobody can be accepting of everyone’s beliefs as they will still always outcast and persecute those who do not accept everyone’s beliefs. You can be who you are, as long as it is what they say you should be.

Over time I have been contacted by several women and even a couple of men. It means a lot to me to read and hear from others who believe as I do. In the society we live in today it’s controversial (and that’s putting it tamely) to even say that a man should support his wife. In reality it should just be assumed that a man will support his wife but I have been treated with scorn and contempt from both sexes just for daring to say such a thing.

I remember how when I got married the preacher said that God calls wives to submit to their husbands. I didn’t think anything about it at all. I might have downcast my eyes shyly but there never registered even a hint of outrage nor offense inside of me. It seemed natural to me. I saw nothing wrong with it. This was before I ever even heard about feminism or women’s lib or domestic violence or anything. I remember being asked once when I was about sixteen if I was a feminist. I had no idea what a feminist even was. I said “sure, I guess” because I thought it was something about being feminine. Then I was informed it was about women’s rights and I said no, that I was not a feminist. In reality I had no caring of the sort about “rights.” I knew I might work for a little while but I always hoped to get married and have my husband support me and take care of me.

It was later that mistrust began to develop. Something was wrong with the world today but I did not know what. Women’s rights and feminism seemed like the way to go but it just didn’t feel right. Being “equal” didn’t feel right. It felt cold. It felt wrong. It felt unjust. It felt that way because it was- and is- cold, wrong and unjust. I started this site to be a voice for women, for families. Without men providing for and protecting women there can be no prosperity, no stable family ties, no civilization.

For the first probably three years of marriage I was always on guard fearing abandonment. It took about three years before I began to really believe that he was going to support me and that I could depend on him truly to do so. It took so long before I could even tell my husband I trusted him. He seemed to change after that. I know he wanted to protect me and support me from the beginning but it seemed to take on a different meaning after that. It has taken me years longer to really believe all the things he has told me to be the truth. Our past has not been easy and we have come through a lot. But I know now he will forsake all others for me, as I will for him.

Without my dependence on him I don’t think we would have made it. If he hadn’t been my provider I could not have felt so deeply for him as I always have. I might not have stayed if I had somewhere else to go. Yes, I have loved him since I was a teenager but that could never be enough. I had to know that I could trust him. The first step was his provision of me but I also had to believe the things he said to me. I needed to understand the truth and without knowing it I would do any crazy thing to leave, to get away, to ease the hurt inside. But now I think I understand that he is not lying to me, that I can trust what he says- especially about our past. There has been a mistrust that has characterized our relationship since the beginning and it has always been an antagonism between us, but all I’ve ever wanted to know is that I can trust him. I don’t give a damn about what anyone else thinks or believes and I never have.

I have been put down for being in the home. I feel like my family always tries subtle ways to get me to have a career- usually by instilling distrust of my husband in me and then *subtly* reminding me that I have not finished college. People always love to make “suggestions” about how I should seek employment to relive my apparent boredom or whatever else. A career is the cure-all for the modern woman. Heaven forbid a woman might find fulfillment outside of the workforce. I have literally been called names and been called lazy for not having a “job.” Funny, if I was a career woman they would never call me such things, even if I was divorced three times and had kids with several different fathers or engaged in frequent drunken one night stands. As long as I was a co-provider and didn’t ever depend on a man or the welfare system to support me or my kids I would be acceptable- no matter how crazy or hectic my life. But I do not care. Call me what you will. Throw stones if you will. I will not waver. I would die for a principle. I would die for what I believe.

Yes, I have changed my husband. That’s what women do. Men will change if their women demand it of them. He has changed for me. But I would never do him wrong. I can never disrespect him because he has worked hard all these years to take care of me. I have never really been able to say anything bad about who he is today even when I am angry. Even though it is a rare occasion indeed that he ever does any housework or childcare I’ve never called him lazy. I could never do that because he takes care of me.

My house is not always spotless. We actually live in the house so it is impossible for it to be spotless all the time. Yet I work hard everyday. I’m not some Stepford wife nor do I believe the 1950s were the golden age of the family. I don’t even think that’s ideal. I don’t want to change the world. Sure it would be nice but that’s a pretty big goal and I just don’t think I have the dedication that would take. I know everyday this site gets many hits from search engines. I don’t know everything people search for. I don’t know who’s reading this. I may never know who my writings impact. I alone cannot save this culture. Maybe there is no saving it, but it is my hope that I can at least save a few individuals.

There is a real sadness in my heart when I look at the world around me. This website gives me an outlet to express my frustration, my hopes and my beliefs and put them out there for the world to see. I hope that this site will bless those who read it and be a help to those looking for answers. Of course, I cannot have all the answers for anyone nor have I ever claimed to but I hope maybe this site can be a help to guide someone in the right direction or guide them to whatever it is they are seeking.

Those who have supported me throughout these years of writing are of many cultures, many religions and speak many different tongues. I thank you for making this site what it is today.

And to my husband, my love, the father of my child, thank you for sticking by me and for your continued support. May we be different from the world and may we have many long years together.

May you always keep strong in your beliefs,

The Radical One

Posted in Personal Relationships, Updates | Tagged , | 2 Comments

A Woman’s Needs

“The center of a woman’s happiness in marriage is to be loved- but the center of a man’s is to be admired.” – Helen B. Andelin 

It’s well known that a man has needs. A good wife fulfills those needs. A good wife takes care of the children, the home, greets her husband at the door, feeds him home-cooked meals, gives him sex regularly, makes him feel like a man… If she doesn’t fulfill those needs then her husband strays and it’s all her fault…

Yet the woman stays home every day, keeps herself in good shape, makes her home pretty, faithfully attends to her duties…And all the while she waits…

Every once in a while she wants to let her hair fall down her back, to dress up pretty and be appreciated. The heels on her feet, the stockings so carefully rolled up her legs, the powdered face and rouged lips, the cinched in waist and minidress…An investment that gives no return…Nobody’s around to see it, to appreciate it. To sit there for hours looking pretty but getting nothing but a headache in return for all her attention to detail. On the weekends she hopes he’ll notice her, that he’ll take her out. She waits all day but nobody ever sees her, ever notices her. At the end of the day she resigns herself once again to her fate, washes the makeup off and never expects anything will ever change. It’s all been a waste. Might as well let the house get dirty and the dishes pile up in the sink and not worry about the mascara streaks down her face from where she’s cried so much…Her makeup’s ruined now but it’s not like he’d notice. He’ll never take her out this weekend or the next. He’s never done so but maybe once or twice in all these years…

The longing desire for happiness, for attention, to be shown off every once in a while. The desire to be loved. The desire for once to get a break from the constant housework, the bleeding hands and the noisy and messy children… But for her there is no escape. She fulfills his needs but he never has time for hers. Either he doesn’t understand or he doesn’t care that she needs more than what he’s giving.

Like most men he doesn’t get it and if she draws away from him it’s some big shocker that he never saw coming. It’s almost a point of pride for a man to exclaim that he doesn’t understand a woman, but it’s really not all that hard. She just wants him but he always has something better to do… She doesn’t want some fool that dotes on her every word- no she’d be disgusted at him for that and think him less of a man. But she wants to feel like a woman, she wants to be loved and appreciated. Just as much as he wants the chance to be a man she wants the chance to be a woman. He may provide for her physical needs, but emotionally he deprives her.

And the winter days fade to spring and the spring days blossom bright and hot into summer. Yet she still sits there, pretty and waiting for something that’s never going to come…

Posted in On Being a Woman, Personal Relationships | Tagged | Leave a comment

Childbearing, Working Women, Man-Pleasing and the Figure

What I want to know is this: if having children “ruins” a woman’s figure then why did your average woman in the 1950s have a waist size that was seven inches smaller than what women’s are today, even though 1950s women had, on average, a lot more children than women do today? Obviously it becomes a bit absurd to blame childbearing for the reason women get out of shape especially since, from what I’ve seen, it is usually the women who don’t have children who are the most out of shape.

If you look at other mammals it’s quite easy to see that most of them become very skinny (and usually stay that way) after having their babies. Obviously it’s something in our environment and lifestyle that has caused us to be out of shape, not our biology or childbearing. Despite our higher level of social organization, we humans are, underneath it all, still mammals.

I’ve never been overweight and I’m a mother. I still wear bikinis at the beach. But I’ve always made it a point to stay in shape. Admittedly, I got out of shape over the fall and winter. I used to walk one and a half hours every day then my treadmill broke. I became frustrated as there was really no way to walk adequately outdoors where I live and I took an exercise hiatus.. The petite 26 1/2 inch waist I had turned into a 29 inch waist. Granted, your average American woman still has half a foot more around her waist than me, but that’s hardly a consolation. I have since gone back to working harder than before (and plan to do so for the rest of my life) and the weight is starting to come back off. It takes a lot for me to admit how out of shape I got because I’m very ashamed of it, but I refuse to stay out of shape or ever again become out of shape. I don’t care if I have to do jumping jacks in my living room for two hours everyday, I’m going to stay in shape. I don’t diet, however, as dieting messes with the body’s hormones and usually makes you fat in the long run. I eat when I’m hungry and eat I until I’m full. I also eat real sugar.

Admittedly, I’m a bit of a man pleaser. Ok, maybe a lot. Today women are supposed to dress only for themselves and not give a damn about what men think but I’m a bit more traditional. (Ok, that’s an understatement as those who follow me know I’m radically traditional). I like to look good. I like to dress pretty and I like the feedback I get from my husband. Even though I don’t go around trying to tease other men intentionally I still also like to know I’m attractive. I rarely see a woman around where I live wearing anything other than jeans and a t-shirt. I, however, love dresses, skirts, lacy lingerie, high heels and red lipstick. I wear jeans sometimes but usually try to look as feminine as possible whenever I do. I also never cut or trim my hair so it falls a little past my waist when it is down.

Staying home allows me to focus on my family and focus on staying in shape for my husband. I have plenty of time to stay active and work out. I do my chores and have spare time for staying in shape. It is one of the privileges of being a traditional woman. But my husband as well has privileges as he doesn’t have to come home and do anything. Unless he’s working on some project or fixing something he normally comes home and watches TV. He has plenty of free time to devote to his own interests as well. With egalitarian marriage comes the loss of privileges for both spouses. More than likely the stress of working makes women put on weight and, as well, nobody even lives in the home (that they are majorly in debt for) and they spend their lives rushing around barely even having time for family, their spouse, cooking healthy food or regular exercise.

Biology isn’t destiny (for example, just look how feminized modern men have become in the post-feminist world) and evolution doesn’t happen quickly enough for it to be to blame for the obesity epidemic. We all are genetically predisposed to be many different things in this life but the fact is that our environment, our lifestyles and our actions affect our hormones, brain chemistry and the way our genes express themselves. Maybe going back to the basics and embracing masculinity, femininity and sex roles would do a lot to normalize our lives and keep us all happier and healthier.

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How to be pleasing to your husband

These are my opinions and personal experiences about staying in shape. I’m not a doctor so don’t be a retard. If you have some health question or issue see a professional.

There are also medications, health problems and other factors that can influence our weight, but that is not the subject of this post.

Posted in Commentary | Tagged , ,

“Can’t Hold Us Down”

The Christina Aguilera video below is the stuff I grew up on. Of course, I never had a mother or mother-figure to tell me what exactly was wrong with this video and that those “double standards” actually served a purpose. I remember me and my husband talking once and we were talking about how neither of us had ever even heard the word “illegitimate” growing up. We never even knew what it meant. The only thing I ever heard from my mother growing up was the importance of birth control and that I needed college and a good career and not to have babies until I had finished college and was “ready” or “in a serious relationship” or something. I was never quite clear on when exactly it was OK to have sex or when babies should ideally come along (or if they were ever even supposed to).

This song actually strikes right at the heart of patriarchy, but none of us girls belting out the lyrics to the song could have possibly known that when we were growing up or understand the significance of it. It’s very confusing when you’re told on the one hand to express yourself sexually and do what you want yet on the other hand when the consequences of sex (i.e., babies) inevitably follow all of a sudden you’ve done something wrong and nobody can quite understand “how this could have happened” and how things became so messed up. On the one hand young women and girls are sexualized by the media and taught free sex is OK yet on the other hand she’s done something wrong by actually following what the media teaches (and nobody ever teaches her how she should act as the media, the Hollywood stars and her peers are her primary- and sometimes only- teachers). That should probably be termed the real double standard; the double standard in expectations as if actions have no consequences in life. Older women would rather be hostile to the younger women rather than teach them the right way to behave and be loved and happy in life and the men generally stay silent on the issue.

After being taken care of and provided for by a man for so long it was a bit unnerving to see this video after so many years and see how both the men and the women were up in each other’s faces and looked as if they might even physically attack each other at any moment. Also interesting (and I’m sure completely insignificant) is that the video appears to be set in a dirty poverty-stricken ghetto neighborhood. A woman is even carrying around a young child at the end of the video. (The significance of that, I’m sure, is anyone’s guess. Maybe her baby will grow up to be a good feminist man who follows orders).

“Sisterhood” of course is promoted in the song and video. The women appear to be just as immature as the boy-men in the video whom they are criticizing. The in-your-face sexual perversion in the video is crude and uncomfortable. The video is a wonderful display of the lawlessness, perversion, poverty and antagonism between the sexes that feminism and sexual promiscuity creates. If he attacks you, attack him back girl…We got your back…

No, the males shown in the video and described by the song are not men- and they never will be so long as the girls are sexually free.

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Why I Hope the Supreme Court Strikes Down “Gay Marriage” Bans

“…But on the other hand we hold that the new status will prove to be the worst kind of communism. The relations between the sexes, now so carefully guarded by religion and by parents, by law and by society, will become common and therefore corrupt. The family, the foundation of the state, will disappear…

The marriage tie will be weakened, and separation recurred to as an ordinary remedy. It is even probable that the duration of the bond will finds its limitation in expediency, and the marriage contract be assumed for limited periods, or for other purposes….”(1)

Next month the Supreme Court of the United States will hear gay marriage cases and decide upon gay marriage as a “constitutional right.” As much as I am opposed to the idea that two homosexual couples can actually be “married,” I hope that the Court will rule it as a constitutional right.

Yes, you heard me right. I hope the Court strikes down gay marriage bans as unconstitutional. 

I hope gay marriage goes nationwide. It’s not like it could possibly do any more damage to the marriage institution anyways. The institution of marriage was pretty much destroyed years ago, with legal marriage only offering a few “benefits” to those who enter into what used to be a permanent and binding covenant between a man and a woman sanctioned by law, religion and custom.

The conservative case against gay marriage will be weak. What will the Right do? Throw the Bible at them? They’ll just be branded as bigots in the throes of religious dogma. Say it destroys the rights of children? It’s not like children aren’t already being raised in a whole host of non-family arrangements based upon “anything goes”  legal policies and whatever contract adults choose to make with each other. Family ties are already so weak, “blended” and “rotational” that a few gay couples here and there raising kids probably won’t even be noticed.

Marriage used to have real and true meaning but not anymore. Marriage used to be an institution that safeguarded a father’s rights and the security of women and children. But now a man by default has the same rights and responsibilities to children fathered via a drunken one-night stand with a woman who is a complete stranger as he does within legal marriage. He can walk in or out of rights and responsibilities at his own whim and few women can expect to be provided for by husbands anymore.

Marriage used to be about men financially providing for women and children, but not anymore. Most women today enter into relationships with boy-men who become financially dependent upon them. Nearly half of all men have wives and live-in girlfriends who are better educated and have a better paying job than they do. Marriage was already bastardized a long time ago to hold both spouses jointly responsible for all debts, financial matters and decisions made in the family. Alimony, where for centuries a husband was required to provide for a wife for a lifetime, has now been reduced to some kind of gender-neutral and temporary “spousal support” and nothing more.

Marriage today has so little legal meaning that a marriage license is barely even worth the paper it’s printed on. It’s not about a man coming forward and calling upon a woman, of making his intentions to court her known and taking her under his wing and providing for her in the honorable state of marriage for a lifetime.

Marriage today is barely more “honorable” than just moving in together. Today men can expect to be able to live with a girlfriend for a while and, if they get “serious” enough about each other (or happen to have a few kids together) they might get married later. His girlfriend will split the bills with him and he gets free sex.

Now a man takes a woman as his wife and she helps him pay the rent and helps provide for him. And, oh yeah, he gets to have sex with her (if she’s in the mood, of course. If she’s not then he becomes the all-maligned “marital rapist”). A man can expect to gain with marriage these days a roommate that helps him pay the bills.

So what is marriage about? It’s not a permanent commitment. Either party can walk away whenever. It’s not a covenant. The vows don’t mean much as a person’s word isn’t worth anything these days. Pretty much anything that comes out of a person’s mouth these days is all BS until proven to be true. It’s not about raising children. Most children aren’t even raised within legal marriage with both parents in an intact and stable family unit. It’s not about paternity. It’s not a requirement for respectable sex. Is it about love? romance? insurance benefits? commitment?

There’s nothing sex-specific about “love” and “commitment” is there? So why, then, cannot anyone marry? After all a person can feel “love” for someone of the same sex and people have all kinds of sexual fetishes. It’s all just a personal and private thing between “two consenting adults” so why not have gay marriage?

Indeed, why not?

The foundation of marriage has been chipped away at for so long there’s barely anything left. Maybe the only way change can happen is by allowing gay marriage; by completely demolishing what’s left of the broken, chipped, cracked, weathered and destroyed foundation. Maybe only then will the institution completely collapse. Maybe only then can a social revolution occur to rebuild the foundation of marriage and restore it to it’s former meaningful and respected position in society. Maybe only then will things have gotten so bad and gone so far down that the only way to go is up. Maybe only then can the old fade away and a new beginning be possible.

So I say bring the popcorn and the beer and let’s get on with the show…

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Considering how meaningless marriage has become, I hereby withdraw any opposition I’ve ever had to gay marriage

Posted in Commentary, Current Events, Marriage, Opinion Pieces, Personal Relationships, Political | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment